10 Men You Must NOT Marry!
(An immortal instructions to mortal ladies)
"Life is too short to have stutterer as your director."
So many single ladies are crying for a husband while so many married women are divorcing on daily basis. What could be responsible for the abuses, divorces, killings and their likes going on so many marriages?
Every man or woman going into marriage should consider certain things before "YOU SAY I DO!"
Below is a piece of my advice for ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!
#1: Men that buy things to show off rather than things that make a home.
Most guys don't even have a teaspoon to their name in the house.
I knew of a guy that wears very expensive clothes yet doesn't have a matrass in his room.
That's a sign that he would find it very difficult making a family when he marries.
If at 30, he doesn't have a good room with at least the cheapest fan and his clothes are worth more than fifty thousand naira, sister take to your heels.
If he cannot buy fan now that he has N10, 000, I bet you he will not buy a piece of land worth N1m when he has N10m.
#2: Men that value their friends more than their families!
This could be controversial!
But the truth remains that if he values you as a girlfriend more than his mother, don't marry him.
Because soon, he will value his side chick and friends more than his wife.
If you call it nothing that he values his friend(s) more than his family, remember that you become his family once you marry him. So get ready to enjoy the turn of the table.
#3: Men with poor/low mentality
Funnily enough, the handset of so many these days are more expensive than their mindset.
What will determine the level and nature of argument/conflict and its denouement(resolution) is the level of your man's mindset.
Some men are so shallow minded that they think they are always right and can argue to high heavens every blessed day to prove it.
Hey sister! You would lead a very frustrated life if you marry such a man.
A man's mindset are shaped based on the quality of friends he keeps and the quality of books he reads.
Level of school attended is different from level of education acquired.
I have seen a masters degree holder with elementary/primary one mentality.
A man with low mentality is quite disastrous! It's just an explosive seeking a soft landing.
Men with low/poor mentality are too myopic!
Low mentality is infectious as well! I bet you, you can't beat him to it. He will drag you to his level.
If you can't authentically change him now, don't marry him!
#4: Harsh men who abusive careless in words and actions.
Listen sister! So many things had gone wrong in so many families due to spoken words.
Most suicide cases in the world today are as a result of banters from partners.
The deadliest and most painful type of murder/killing is "dictional" (of spoken words).
Using nasty angry words at each other is quite unwelcoming and dangerous for a family.
There's nothing wrong whatsoever with playing with nasty curse words (though to an extent), but when said in angry mood/time it becomes worrisome.
If he shouts/curses or uses abusive words at people whenever he is angry, and doesn't care who gets hurt, be careful sister!
He might not be doing it to you at this stage perhaps because he's still trying to win you into marrying him. But remember, no politician continues campaign after winning an election. So after the marriage, "your eyes go open".
Words create and at the same time can destroy what has been already.
Abusive words can turn your child into a moron over night.
Just as the proverb asserts: whatever you call your dog is what it answers.
You see "you are stupid" "you are mad" "you are a bastard" "idiot" "nincompoop" "you are a useless goat" etc. Those words are DEEP! And can pierce faster and deadlier than sword.
Sister! Mind those who don't mind their tongue/words.
More also, if he beats you while you are dating or courting, he will kill you when he marries you!
#5: Men that LACK appetite for God's word!
The cure to marital madness is the word of God.
So many men (and women alike) can see movies for six hours at ago but finds it difficult to listen to the word of God for even a minute.
What puts men in checks is God's immortal instructions enshrined in His word. How would he be checked if he lacks appetite for it.
Just as the scripture says: Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the word of God. He wouldn't have the drive to be a good husband/father if he doesn't see God as God.
#6: Men that spend a lot on you more than they spend on their mother and by extension their family.
That shows how much he spends outside his home.
I know you might consider this an affront but the truth remains that no man gets rich by waste.
He is at the poor level he is today because what he would have invested were all used to impress you (and your predecessors) with expensive gifts.
Don't be fooled by those gifts, he will stop whenever he wins/marries you. Just as the politicians will always do.
Don't misunderstand my stand. I never said gifting is wrong. But when it becomes regular and expensive, you need to know his net-worth/financial portfolio.
The period of covid19 really gave us the opportunity to assess our spending drift. But how many men will learn from it.
Imagine if part of the money used in buying you gifts when you were dating were saved or used to buy shares/cryptocurrency/assets, what would have been the returns.
A certain time in the past it was brazilian hair (worth one thousand dollars plus) that was trending and some men were intimidating their future by expending their hard earned money to have their girlfriend wear that.
As at the time of this trend, a plot of land in some areas in Nigeria costs below $300. A plot in those same areas now costs more than $1000 in less than five years. I bet you, those hairs are no longer useful now. And some of the girls are no longer with the BOYS that bought them those.
You both love yourselves and would want to marry each other right? Help him curtail his careless spending.
"When your outgo (expenses) exceeds your income, your up-keep becomes your downfall"
Does he even pay tithe? I know this one may sound awkward but he needs to be asked.
#7: Men that don't have minds of their own.
Some men can't make decisive decisions on their own so most often they take wasteful and hurtful actions based on multiple chicanery advice of friends and families.
A man is the head of the family and as such must make decisions that affect the family.
The quality of his decisions and otherwise determines the destiny of the family.
Asking questions or seeking advice is not and will never be condemned by implication of this post.
However, when all of a man's decisions and actions are based on what people say/advise him to do, then there is trouble looming.
If you marry such a man, then he will treat you based on what his parents and friends tell him.
A man has got to be man enough to take decisions by himself sometimes.
The greatest truth and true advice to a man lies within him.
Marry men that look inwards most times!
#8: Men that do not have strength of Character.
Forbid yourself from marrying a big child. I repeat emphatically: FORBID YOURSELF FROM MARRYING A BIG CHILD.
It is always pathetic!
Marriage is between a man and a woman (mature minds), not between a boy and a girl. So never marry mummy's boy!
How stable is he with his stands and decisions?
Marry a man who can stand on his words/decisions and not be moved by side talks from family or friends.
There is a wide margin between strength of character and pride.
Strength of character is:
Making a decision and standing by it.
Reaching an agreement with someone and keeping it.
Respecting your partner's interest and accommodating it without abandoning your goals/decisions.
Doing first things first.
Keeping your promises.
Discipline is the watchword!
Marriage is for better or worse! The choice is yours NOW before you say I do!
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. So choose your "BROKEN" before one chooses you!